When was the last time you played? I don’t mean watching TV shows or playing some game at work where stress and humiliation are cleverly masked under the guise of motivational fun. I mean an enjoyable activity with no schedule, no deadlines, and no anxiety about how messy you get or how stupid you look. Something you choose to do, you don’t have to do. Playing to play, not to win.
Often on the journey from childhood to adulthood, we forget how and why to play. One day we woke up … grown-ups! It is as if there is a mysterious inner tour guide in our head saying, “The time has come to leave Barbie and her pink caravan behind and enter the real world of serious thinkers and entrepreneurs.” And therefore a long stretch of all work begins and there is no play. (Remember the psycho that Jack Nicolson became in the movie, The Shining, when that happened!)
But we don’t have to give up our inner child so easily. One day, while walking through a park near my house with Joe and our dogs, we repeated a dialogue that we had several times while passing through this park.
I said, “I used to love going to the swings when I was a kid.”
He said, “So why don’t you do it?”
I said, “Me? Here? I would look silly.”
But on this day, all the swings were empty, and when he nudged me again, I decided to do it. I sat on the flexible seat (hmmm, much more padded than the swing of my childhood which consists of hard metal seats with steel posts anchored loosely to the ground by a piece of concrete that rose dangerously from the grass when it climbed high) . I began the movements of bending and straightening my legs, gradually adding height and speed. (It’s like riding a bike, you never forget it). Within seconds, I was engulfed by that familiar gust of wind in my hair and tickling my belly. As I climbed up, I laughed out loud and yelled at Joe like a five-year-old, “Look, I can touch the sky!” When I was ready to go down, I gently scraped my feet into the smooth brown bark below me, slowing down enough for a flying takedown. I could still do it! He was young again. That was the first of many visits to my neighborhood swing, just for fun!
Playing is very easy to do (after all, kids can do it 16 hours a day) and it doesn’t have to cost a lot. Next time you’re in a toy department, spend a couple of bucks and pick up a brightly colored, or maybe striped, hoola-hoop. It’s guaranteed to provide plenty of laughs, whether alone (looking in a mirror, of course) or when your friends come to visit. It’s going to take a while to get back on track, so here’s a hint: lean it down at the front and take the first swing slower than you think you need to. Then let the twist begin!
A Goddess is never too old to play. Remember the 1983 hit song by Cindi Lauper, “Girls just want to have fun?” In 2003, at age fifty, Cindi was still performing that song on tour. I caught her on a VH1 special “Divas Live” in 2004; it was a pleasure to see her, still singing, dancing and smiling … still having fun.
5 ways to play:
o Take a break to play with your kids, whether it’s a board game, riding a bike, running around the backyard, or jumping in rain puddles.
o Try to make ordinary housework fun (sing silly made-up songs while doing them, have a pillow fight with your bed partner).
o Make a list of your favorite children’s games or activities and commit to doing one of them weekly.
o When you are especially stressed at work, spend a few minutes with something meaningless (doodling, walking outside, picking a flower).
o Every now and then, honor your inner child by playing first and working later.