Today porn addiction has become the “new elephant in the living room.” Nobody talks about it! It is being ignored, hidden and denied by family members. There are over 40 million people addicted to pornography. Pornography is easily accessible and allows you to remain anonymous. With a computer and Internet access, he is available twenty-four hours a day.
Pornography is a thief of dignity, time, creativity, talent, and money. Pornography users neglect family, work, and social activities due to increasing time spent online looking for pornography and cybersex. Addiction will erode one’s mental, spiritual, and emotional well-being.
Alabama
“At first, I used to relax with pornography, but eventually I was spending so much time online that I didn’t take the time to do my homework, take the kids to ball practice, or read to them before bed.
If my wife caught me, I would quickly hide what was on the screen. She never liked sex. She often told him that she was too fat. I told him, “all men watch porn, it’s not a big deal.” At least I wasn’t sleeping with anyone.
Departure
“I kept promising myself that I would never look at pornography again. But I would get stressed at my new job as CFO, back-to-back football games, and helping the kids with their homework. I was physically and emotionally drained.
Since my divorce I had gone the extra mile with the kids to make up for their father’s absence. Later at night, after the kids were asleep, I would pour myself a glass of wine and search for pornography to stave off loneliness and depression. Later I would fall asleep crying feeling more self-hatred, ashamed and alone than before.”
Every day, 40 million people experience the same pain as Al and Sally. Studies have shown that viewing pornography can alter your mood and have the same effect on the brain as drugs. A chemical in the brain, epinephrine “burns” pornography images permanently into memory at the cellular level, the images can be easily recalled and activated by a word, a display at the mall, or the sight of a woman in the grocery store. or a newsstand.
Many addicts seek out pornography at work. Most begin to isolate themselves from friends and colleagues. Interests and hobbies fall by the wayside. Addicts live in fear of being found out. They stress over living a secret life. It doesn’t matter how many times you promise to stop; quitting smoking becomes impossible.
Who is addicted?
Anyone with a computer, cell phone or PDA with Internet access has the opportunity to become addicted to pornography. Porn addicts are both male and female and come from all walks of life. Porn addicts are in extreme emotional pain due to unresolved painful trauma.
Ask yourself about pornography, “Can I take it or leave it? Am I obsessed? Has it caused problems in my life? Do I continue with the behavior despite my problems?”
Then go thirty days without looking at pornography on or offline. If you really don’t care and don’t have a need to use it, if you rarely think about it, then you probably aren’t addicted.
Treatment is similar for all addictions. Addicts must admit they have a problem and take 100% responsibility for their lives. Recovery from porn addiction has to be a number one priority.
1.Abstinence
Total and complete abstinence from pornography is necessary. You will have to clean the house. Delete and destroy everything that has to do with your addiction online and off. Eliminate cable TV. Tell your phone company to block numbers in the 900 area code.
2. Responsible partners
You need to have some responsible partners. Choose wise, mature and non-addicted partners. Give them permission to confront you about your use of pornography.
3.Therapy
Find an experienced therapist to help you heal your childhood hurts, traumas, and addictive behaviors. You will discover how to become comfortable with genuine intimacy and loving relationships.
4. Join a support group
Isolation keeps you stuck. You can’t heal yourself. Support groups have been shown to work. You will find acceptance, support and comfort.
5. Get intimate
In your primary relationships, learn to give and receive support and affection. Express feelings, needs and share problems. Intimacy is not about sex, it is about love.
Other important treatment tools are learning to deal with cravings, forgiving, refocusing, communicating, living a balanced life, and connecting from the heart.
You have the power to create healthy intimate relationships with family and friends. Thomas Henry Huxley said: “Perhaps the most valuable result of all education is the ability to force yourself to do what you have to do, when you should do it, whether you like it or not.”