Mom came home for hospice care. He didn’t want to leave this world in a cold hospitable environment with people he didn’t know. Her own bed with her furry babies was her choice and we did. I paid hell but it was worth it.
My older sister fought desperately to get Mom put in a nursing home. Mom defended herself. I was his mercenary and it was exhausting. We got home and Mom stayed 3 days to say goodbye and then she passed away.
What happened in those 72 hours was nothing short of astonishing. She became spiritual and I drank her like sweet water after a long walk in the desert. It changed me in the best possible way. It washed away my faith. I woke up after a long and exhausting sleep.
Faith ebbs. It waxes and wanes like the moon phases. When it is strong, I feel invincible. When I am weak and doubtful, sick people enter my world and cause great distress. I’m not sure I can tolerate ‘false Christians’ more.
Cross necklaces and sporadic church attendance do not make one a person of faith. Following the example of unconditional love and acceptance of Jesus of Nazareth is the goal. Some of my own people will never understand this.
I took mom to the hospital with breathing problems. One morning I walked in and her lips were blue. The trip to the hospital was overwhelming. I almost crashed trying to keep the oxygen tube up to his nose and drive the car.
I walked into Terry Ady’s auto repair shop and ran into the shop screaming. A young man ran out and jumped into the driver’s seat. Later I learned that he is the son of a preacher. I intend to visit that church and testify.
Mom woke up, looked at him and said, ‘Who are you?’ before passing out. He and I said the Lord’s Prayer together as he rushed us to the ER. I will never forget the strength and compassion of that young man.
Doctors stabilized Mom and said it was time for hospice care. My older sister showed up after years of absence and tried to take control. Mom was so weak but she said, “Please take me home.” We almost checked her AMA, but she signed the authorization papers in the elevator when I got her out.
As soon as he got to his own bed, he slept for 12 hours. I thought I would sleep through and made the necessary phone calls to the family who cared. When he woke up, he was in a completely different state of mind. She was full of faith. It was amazing to see her so peaceful and ready to leave this world.
She shared that her Uncle Gary would come for her. He also said that there was nothing to fear and that everything we believe is real. She had been to the other side and was excited to return.
A few sips of fresh coffee, a beer sorbet, and a fruit sorbet were his last orders. Smoking took years off her life, but she wanted to smoke a cigarette but couldn’t breathe hard enough to inhale.
For the first time in my life, I lit and inhaled a large puff of smoke to blow into his mouth. She loved him. We finished the cigarette when I began to really taste the tobacco. He jokingly told me not to smoke because it was bad for my health. We share a much needed laugh.